Child Bearing Hibbs

New Truck Blues

lowered truck

In a previous installment I discussed the emasculating situation of buying a brand new truck. I’m now happy to report that my hormone levels have balanced and I’m feeling okay about who I am again.

We’re hot rodders which means most of us like our trucks like we like our hot rods, right? Low. Almost every truck I’ve had in 30 something years of driving has been lowered. Some a little, some a lot, but always lower than stock – where they belong. And yes, I’ve done a few small lifts too but that’s really not my thing. A truck (in my sick little mind) is a sports car with a bed, not an off road bruiser.

I’ve found that taste is changing with my new truck and it’s no fault of my own. It’s GM’s truck division fault.

See, my brand new GMC is a nice truck and I got a great deal. It’s the first NEW truck I’ve ever purchased. Bells, whistles, doo-dads, dingle berries, satellite radio and four wheel drive. That last part is what I’m having the most trouble with. In GM’s infinite wisdom/delusion they seem to have made the world’s LOWEST 4X4 pickup. Don’t believe me? Let me explain.

I do a fair bit of hunting year round so my trucks see a good amount of dirt road driving. So why does my air dam have mud on it?

air dam

Well, you know when you jump in the wife’s car and run an errand? You know that moment when you pull up to the store and those curb thingies that are designed to stop inattentive drivers (not you or me) from jumping the curb catch your eye? You know how you subconsciously plan NOT to drag the air dam over that and make a racket that turns the cringing head of every man card carrying person in the parking lot? Yeah, I now do that in my brand new 4X4, thank you GM.

I’m considering lowering my 4X4 because it’d really only need to come down a few inches to look good. Yes, there are INDEED a few reputable companies who make lowering components for my 1/2 ton 4X4. Yes, I looked.

minimal ground clearance

No, I’m not going to lower it but I realized over the past few weeks I can’t live with a 4X4 sporting an air dam the equivalent of Corvette. This really is an issue so it’s getting a lift sooner than later and 33″ all terrains. I already purchased a 2 1/2″ leveling kit but now I’m thinking of taking it to 3 1/2″ front and 1″ rear lift. Now to find a “sponsor”, ha! Oh yeah, I need wheels and tires too…

If you are looking for some serious ground clearance in a stock truck this certainly isn’t the truck for you, unless you’re willing to throw a small lift on it.

ground-scraping 4x4

Yeah. It’s really that low.

For now.

 

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Eric Hibbs

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